#84 - Specialized Medical Equipment

In the past I've talked a bit on the embarrassment of going to the doctor when you are heavy. The paper gowns don't fit, it's hard to "hop" up onto the table, the embarrassment of the scale, etc., etc., etc. One other thing that has really gotten to me in the past is the need for specialized medical equipment for the super sized. It's not bad enough we're fat, but now we need to be reminded of it when they have to pull out the special equipment.

Last year I needed to have an MRI done. When I called for the appointment, they asked me a series of questions. Are you claustrophobic? Do you have any metal implants? How tall are you? What do you weigh? Upon answering the height and weight questions, the woman on the other end responded with a "hmm.... we might have a problem." That didn't sound good. I asked what the deal was, and she replied that she didn't think I could fit into the tube of the MRI machine. OMG how embarrassing. At least I was on the phone, and not sitting and talking to someone in person. Then she went on to ask me my measurements... a little more embarrassment. She wanted to double check the size of the tube compared to my measurements. I told her my measurements, to which she then asked, "did your doctor take these measurements?" I replied that no, I took them. She said that wasn't good enough and said I needed to have my doctor's office measure me. Dear God, here comes the embarrassment I thought. So I did as told, and went into the doctor for my special measuring appointment, which I must say was just a joy to make over the phone, attempting to explain my situation to the receptionist. "Yes that's right, I need to have someone in your office measure me, cause they don't think I'll fit into the MRI machine..." Wow. It stings just remembering this situation again! So I got my measurements done and called the MRI tech again. Apparently one of my measurements was the exact size of the tube. Great. Was I gonna get stuffed into the tube? I just imagined the horror of sitting inside a giant tube, not being able to move at all, arms pinned to my side, yikes! But when all was said and done, they decided that this wasn't a good option. Instead they sent me for an open-sided MRI. How sad, so fat I actually needed a special machine for the MRI.

But it doesn't stop there. Then my doctor wanted me to have 24 hour blood pressure monitoring. I had to go to this satellite cardiac clinic to get fitted for a blood pressure cuff to wear all day. They tried one, then another, then another... No luck. Too tight. They finally found one in my size, but it was broken. They sent me home, telling me they needed to special order a cuff in my size (embarrassing!). Why is it when you want to be discreet, that's when people shout? The nurse helping me opened the door to my room and shouted out to the other nurses, "do you know where the extra large cuffs are?" The nurses proceeded to shout back and forth about the blood pressure cuffs, other patients watching and listening, as my face began to take on a new shade of pink. Finally the nurse shouted back, "can you special order a big one for me?" Some people just have NO idea! Anyway, a few days later I got a call back... They didn't make the cuff in my size anymore. So I was never able to even have the test done. On a side note: my blood pressure was high due to a medication I was on, I went off the medication and now have totally normal blood pressure, so all was OK. :)

But even going to my routine appointments at the doctor require special equipment. Every time I have my blood pressure taken they have to pull out the big cuff. I have to wait while the nurse unhooks the standard cuff and plugs in the giant sized cuff. This little pause always embarrasses me. My mind races, thinking about my super sized arm. Ugh, I hate being fat!! But... something miraculous happened the other day. I went in for a routine girly doctor appointment. I hopped up on the table (which didn't seem like such a chore this time, btw) and rolled up my sleeve, awaiting the big cuff for my blood pressure reading. To my surprise the nurse grabbed the standard cuff out of it's holder and started fitting it on my arm. I almost stopped her and told her that it wouldn't fit, but who am I to tell her how to do her job, right? Anyway, I waited for her to try in vain but was shocked when the cuff fit. OMG are you serious? The standard blood pressure cuff fit? Was it gonna pop off my arm as she pumped it up? Nope, it seemed to work just fine. I just couldn't believe it. You mean I didn't require a special fat cuff anymore? Wow! I can feel the weight come off, I can see my clothes shrinking, but it wasn't until that day that I could use the normal blood pressure cuff that I was tickled with joy over my weight loss. It felt like such a major day for me. Somehow I equate normal blood pressure cuff with normal size. If I could use the normal blood pressure cuff, it truly meant I was getting closer to a normal size. I was utterly delighted! Sure I know I have a long way to go, but this was a major milestone. I'm am leaving all that special medical equipment behind as I journey forward to normalcy.

Update: Cool news! I woke up this morning, stepped on the scale, and smiled. Today I reached 250. I'm now down 65 pounds and falling! Woo hoo!!!