11.23.2006

#34 - Messy eating: Is all food destined to land on my shirt?

Today I thought I would post an entry with Thanksgiving in mind. Happy Thanksgiving by the way! Just imagine piping hot roast turkey, sage scented stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, green bean casserole, cranberry sauce and hot pumpkin pie with whipped cream. Mmmm, sounds good just thinking about it. But as a large person, one thing always comes to mind when confronted with a nice meal. And no, it has nothing to do with whether or not I will over eat. But rather, why is it that every time I eat, something always seems to fall onto my shirt? I do realize the distance from my plate to my mouth is increased due to my large tummy not allowing me to lean very far over my plate. The other reason is that my ample boobs make for a great landing spot for soup, gravy, and ice cream. I always seem to dribble all kinds of greasy foods onto myself, which sucks because I have ruined so many nice shirts this way. In spilling all over myself, I always feel like a slob. I really do try not to spill, but what am I supposed to do? Wear a bib?

So I was thoroughly enjoying my Thanksgiving dinner today. Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and all the trimmings. I was savoring every bite (because I really have been cutting down on carbs lately, so this was a real luxury), when all of the sudden I dripped gravy all down my shirt. Of course! Why would today be different than any other day?

I would really like to be able to pull myself completely up to the table and not worry about incessantly slobbering all over myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm not some super klutz; my body just seems to get in the way all the time. I hate that being fat makes me a messy eater! I would love to be able to get up from the table without everyone knowing exactly what I ate my last meal!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am so with you on that one, only most of my food falls into my cleavage.

karaokekitty said...

LOL, I can't tell you how many times I've fished food out of my bra. :)

Ayden said...

My boobs get in the way when I eat as well. I can't lean over the table for fear that they'll fall into my food =/